I feel like as a writer I narrate my life as I go. In my head that is. This past month has been a slot of bad luck as in no sales finding myself alone with no food,no gas money. At David’s Tent the worship event God told me he knew of my disappointments. I woke up this morning to finally be excited to a decent check I couldn’t go one more day without money or food and something happened .85 cents is glaring at me in my account. Where is my direct deposit? It’s every Wednesday night for almost 2 years. As I lay and write this I wonder why God. I’m sure it will come maybe a glitch in the system but honestly my entire life is a glitch. So bad I have nicknames for my bad luck. A promised breakfast before school with my daughter to go out was very exciting idea last night, how will I tell her the news. Sometimes I don’t even feel like praying but I know God is here he told me. But what is the purpose is hardship, hardship that never ends. I need to search out the answer.
Things were rough the past 6 months , but the light is at the end of the tunnel. There was a specific person in my life who was tearing me down aggressively . I can take it that’s not my point , I was just tired and it put me mentally in a bad place . I felt like I was going into battle every day alone . But I wasn’t alone , God watched over me . Thankfully things are better ! I’ve just been praying for God to send me a husband. God has removed all the wrongs - where is the right ? I realized it’s seasons we must learn from. Also letting go of people who held your heart . How could I be free for someone new if I still loved the old … which was serving me nothing . I really would love to start a business even if it’s on the side , I have some great ideas I just need time . Im meant for more I know it ! It’s just been a learning process I have faith that God will bring him soon . I’ve been through so much all by myself . Single since 2019 ! I’m going to sleep...
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